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Seasons Beatings!

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Krazy_Kroz's picture
Fluffy Bunny
Kickstarter Backer
Posts: 22
Submitted: Thu, 03/01/2013 - 00:51

Hope this isn't too late. Not sure if competition closes start of the 3rd or end, doh!

Anyway, here is my version of 'Let It Snow'

Ohhh, the cars all lined up look frightful
But their chrome and spikes look delightful
The peds have got no place to go
Hit turbo!
Max speedo!
Big combo!

The drivers don't plan on stopping
And their exhausts are crackling and popping
A granny crosses the road real slow
Hit turbo!
Max speedo!
Big combo!

Bloodied headlights shine through the night
And the race is going down a storm
The cars go round the corners tight
And the blood on the bonnets stays warm!

As the last ped lies there dying
Max thinks of the upgrades he'll be buying
But first he better finish the race so
Hit turbo!
Max speedo!
Big combo!

Hope you guys had an awesome Christmas and New Year!

"She likes it sideways. My car that is."

macacom's picture
Cunning Stunt Licker
Kickstarter Backer
Posts: 126
Submitted: Thu, 03/01/2013 - 10:17

Ahoy! I chose "Wonderful Dream (Holidays are coming)". I apologize if I've done some bad grammar or vocabulary mistakes, Englsih is not my main language.

Wonderful Carnage

When the world is ever screaming
Like a hot rod engine on
There's a source of evilness in the air
Let the fury flow your brain and the race start

A wonderful carnage of peds and gore for everyone
Of running fast in perfect hamorny
A wonderful carnage of speed and crash for everyone
To celebrate the baddest number one

Now the people's running desperate
Just got Pedestrians glued to the ground!
Holy crap Hot rod and Electro-bastard ray are on with Pedestrian harvest
Motherf***er too much blood I can't see!

A wonderful carnage of wreck and destruction for everyone
Crashed my car into that damn wall
A wonderful carnage of death and laughter for everyone
Don is aiming right at me

Carmageddon's coming
Carmageddon's coming
Celebrate your carnage dreams come true
Speed is the reason it's always a good thing

Whatch out - look around
You're going to be wasted now!

A wonderful carnage of power ups and credits for everyone
You can't beat Solid granite car
A wonderful carnage of waste and crazyness for everyone
Race completed - I wanna do it all again!

Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill
Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill
Celebrate your carnage dreams come true
Driving is the reason I've made it an evil thing

Madman Tony for president!

shane's picture
Community Manager
Stainless
Posts: 1275
Submitted: Thu, 03/01/2013 - 15:39

Krazy_Kroz wrote:
Hope this isn't too late. Not sure if competition closes start of the 3rd or end, doh!

Nope, your not too late!

Please remember that it's only one entry per member - if you have posted more than 1, please edit your posts to indicate which one you would like us to use otherwise your first entry will only be counted!

MadManTony's picture
Stainless
StainlessKickstarter Backer
Posts: 45
Submitted: Thu, 03/01/2013 - 22:18

some outstanding stuff guy and girls,
Max is a happy psycho today,
bah fucking fucking humbug

lemonrev's picture
Velociraptor Fister
Kickstarter Backer
Posts: 1627
Submitted: Fri, 04/01/2013 - 11:11

the humbug always humming when you dont need it too... What a pain in the a$$ lol.

shane's picture
Community Manager
Stainless
Posts: 1275
Submitted: Fri, 04/01/2013 - 11:15

This competition is now closed. Thank you for all your entries! We are currently in the process of selecting a winner and runners up.

shane's picture
Community Manager
Stainless
Posts: 1275
Submitted: Mon, 07/01/2013 - 16:26

Hey everyone,

We've been through all your fantastic submissions and can now reveal the winner and runners-up!

Firstly, the winning entry goes to Ubiquitous Umberto with a twisted version of 'Winter Wonderland'! Congratulations! A Carmageddon: Reincarnation poster signed by the team will be on it's way to you!

Spoiler:
Car horns blare
Are ya listenin?

In the lane
Blood is glistenin'

A beautiful sight
Limbs flying tonight

Walking through the crosswalk unaware

Back and forth go the wipers
And the old folks
Fill their diapers

The car slides their way
And they kneel down to pray

But their helium filled corpses float away

In the city there's a game of football
The players run away the best they can
But it's my car that can run a little faster
And now you can scoop the team up in a pan

See those peds?
They're on fire
Douse the flames
With your tires

They're running in place
These greased shoes are great
But oh dear now my bodywork is trashed

In the meadow there's a herd of cattle
Quite a difference from those circus clowns
Just enable Hot-rod mode and plow right through them
But make sure your car stays on the ground

In the snow
Ain't it thrillin'
To drive around
And kill millions
The white turns to red
As they're caught on your tread

How bout I smash those polar bears instead?

We have 2 runners-up who will each receive a t-shirt of their choice from the Carmageddon Store. The first runner-up goes to Sasquatch Sodomy with a unqiue version of "It's beginning to feel a lot like Christmas"!

Spoiler:
I'm beginning to feel a lot more limbless
Ev'rywhere I go
Take a look down the street and see, Juicy Jones has it in for me
In his eyes my death is just a better score

I'm beginning to feel a lot more limbless
Not yet a mutant corpse
The most terrible sight to see, is the front-end of Lewie
Covered in my gore

Heinz Faust slides and scoots as Val brakes with her boots
Peds are squished and torn to shreds
Ed takes to the sky, but he won't fly too high
Slaughter Mortar makes him dead

And I go after Stig but kill my stupid self instead

I'm beginning to feel a lot more limbless
Ev'rywhere I go
Then the beautiful trunk of a tree, becomes the newest home for me
Ivan you bastard, your death will set me free

I'm beginning to feel a lot more limbless
These laps are such a farce
Kill the flagger and Burly Shirley, and screw over everyone right behind me
With an oil slick from my arse

And the final runner-up is Celebratory_Jiggly_INALD with a not so pedestrian friendly version of 'God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen'!

Spoiler:
God help ye fool pedestrians
if you get in my way,
or if you get to close to my
electro-bastard ray.
You're just time bonuses with legs.
What more is there to say?
O-oh splatters of i-innards and gore.
Innards and gore!
O-oh spla-atters of i-innards and gore.

The track was called the Fridge Racer.
The flagman scarcely died
before Ivan the Bastard went
into a spinning slide.
I rammed his arse into a fir
and out the other side.
O-oh splatters of i-innards and gore.
Innards and gore!
O-oh spla-atters of i-innards and gore.

I'd murdered four opponents and
was on the final hunt.
I gifted Madam Scarlett with
my fav'rite cunning stunt.
I shoved her off a cliffside, then I
landed on the (bitch).
O-oh splatters of i-innards and gore.
Innards and gore!
O-oh spla-atters of i-innards and gore.

Thanks to everyone who entered!

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