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Seasons Beatings!

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Simista's picture
Cunning Stunt Licker
Posts: 201
Seasons Beatings!
#1 Submitted: Mon, 10/12/2012 - 16:40

Hellloooo! Sim here!

Back again with a Christmassy themed competition for you all! Yes it really is that time of year again, bloody hell! And although some may grumble and moan in a bah! Humbuggery way at the mere mention of Christmas I think it’s a perfect opportunity to “Carmageddonify” Christmas! :D

This idea came to me after I found myself remastering a classic Christmas carol for fun. Here’s my effort…

Spoiler:
“On the twelfth day of Christmas,
Stainless gave to me,
Twelve dumping cows
Eleven peds a-praying
Ten Cunning Stunts
Nine flying limbs
Eight severed heads
Seven bikini girls
Six muscle men
Five Gory Grannies!
Four Times Combo
Three ways to win
Two cop cars
And a Max in a red Eeeaaa-gggle!”

So for this competition, I want you to remaster your very own Christmas carol (can also be a jingle or Christmas song, Number 1 etc.) inspired by Carmageddon!

Prize
First prize is a Carmageddon: Reincarnation poster signed by team members and any t-shirt from our store. Two runners up will also receive a t-shirt of their choice.

How to Enter & Rules
To enter the competition post your entry here in this thread.
Competition starts Monday 10th December and closes on 3rd January 2013.
Winners will be determined and contacted on the 7th January 2013.
Only ONE entry per person allowed, so be sure to have a good think and present us with only your bestest ideas!
Look forward to seeing the entries!
Sim xxx

Edited by: shane on 25/01/2013 - 11:07

Keep Calm and Draw Cocks

Jimothey's picture
Cunning Stunt Licker
Kickstarter Backer
Posts: 286
Submitted: Mon, 10/12/2012 - 17:32

Dashing through the streets
With a ped stuck to my screen
Over another we go
laughing all the way.
I see a power up
handbrake turn through crowd
Pick up a solid granite car
and waste another opponent.

Splats and guts
Splats and guts
Gory all the way
Oh what fun it is to try
and waste the Suppressor tonight.

Carma Killer's Gonna Get You!

Bartjaah's picture
Norman E. Carnage
PayPal Backer
Posts: 61
Submitted: Mon, 10/12/2012 - 18:27

Have a bloody, bloody Christmas
It's the best time of the year
I don't know if there'll be guts
All pedestrians will fear
Have a bloody, bloody Christmas
And when you walk through BeaverCity
Say goodbye to friends you know
and everyone you kill

Bartjaah's picture
Norman E. Carnage
PayPal Backer
Posts: 61
Submitted: Mon, 10/12/2012 - 18:32

Dashing through the blood
In an Eagle on it's way
Over pedestrians we go,
Laughing all the way
Or only checkpoint chasing
Or having a head-on-head fight
What fun it is to laugh and race
or playing Carma all night

v85rawdeal's picture
Fluffy Bunny
Kickstarter Backer
Posts: 9
Submitted: Mon, 10/12/2012 - 19:10

To the tune of Once in Royal David's City

Once in a small island city,
Worked a bunch of crazy folk,
Leader was a man named Nobby,
Who seemed like a charming bloke:
Behind the wheel, he did change,
Into someone very strange.

He turned the key and hit the pedal,
And revved the engine nice and loud,
He aimed his car at the shoppers,
They ended up looking freshly plowed
He drove his car at some stoners,
And earned a cunning stunt bonus.

Over the hill the cows were grazin';
A chance to do some real hurtin'
He gunned the engine, tires were blazin',
And turned them into a massive beef curtain;
10,000 points or more were scored,
When all this cattle ended up gored.

His headlights seek out the next target,
Looking for someone else to claim;
Be it human, or be it pet,
They're just a stepping stone to fame
Wait a minute he's coming my way,
I'm going to have to run aw......................

spacebug's picture
Fluffy Bunny
Kickstarter Backer
Posts: 28
Submitted: Mon, 10/12/2012 - 19:20

Come they told me, brrrm rrrrm rrrrm rrrrm brrrmmm!
A new game to see, brrrm rrrrm rrrrm rrrrm brrrmmm!
Our wallets we bring, brrrm rrrrm rrrrm rrrrm brrrmmm!
To kickstart the thing, brrrm rrrrm rrrrm rrrrm brrrmmm!
Brrmrrrmrrrmrrrm, brrrrmrrrmrrrmrrrrrrm!

So we rev our cars, brrrm rrrrm rrrrm rrrrm brrrmmm!
Here we come!

Stainless I'm in the poo, brrrm rrrrm rrrrm rrrrm brrrmmm!
I'm a poor student too, brrrm rrrrm rrrrm rrrrm brrrmmm!
I've not much cash to back, brrrm rrrrm rrrrm rrrrm brrrmmm!
The fitting funds I lack, brrrm rrrrm rrrrm rrrrm brrrmmm!

I'll rev my car for you, brrrm rrrrm rrrrm rrrrm brrrmmm!
Hear it thrum!

Espyo's picture
Velociraptor Fister
Community VIPKickstarter BackerModerator
Posts: 1471
Submitted: Mon, 10/12/2012 - 20:51

Bartjaah, you have to pick one of them. The rules say one entry per person. Just edit the post on the one you want to be removed, and write something like "(Remove please)", and a mod will take care of that quickly.
I'll post mine real soon; hope you don't mind if it's loosely based on yours, Sim. At least the base music is the same.

I'm Espyo from the Carmageddon Wiki!
I'm currently working on a fangame engine for Pikmin games.

Jordamn's picture
Fluffy Bunny
Posts: 38
Submitted: Mon, 10/12/2012 - 21:33

Running down in school zones
Listening to the sound of broken bones
Stop your Eagle now!!
But she didn't want to slow down
Did a great figure of hate
In the middle of the interstate

She'll dismember our legs
She always gets into wrecks
She's the self-crowned queen
of the race scene

You just mangled another grandma at the mall
watching Stella Stunna drives his car head on into a wall
You're mad and twisted like Helga Shwein
because of your damaged brain

She drives like crazy
Her car's a bloody mess
She drives like crazy
She's got a christmas death list I guess

She's a demon
Behind the wheel
Thinks she's drivin'
The BatmadMobile

SeaOfInsanity's picture
Fluffy Bunny
Kickstarter Backer
Posts: 28
Submitted: Tue, 11/12/2012 - 00:13

I'm dreaming of a red Christmas
Just like the ones I used to race
Where the people panic
As I go manic
Grinding victims in the face

I'm dreaming of a red Christmas
With every racer that I waste
May your pain bring me some time
So that I can finish this with haste

lemonrev's picture
Velociraptor Fister
Kickstarter Backer
Posts: 1627
Submitted: Tue, 11/12/2012 - 10:55

only one, hm, dang cant decide to do a song or a 12 days of chrismass thing lol i think ill stick to the 12 days thing lol..

on the first day day of xmas my god gave on to me a game of carnage all maime and blood.
on the second day of xmas my god gave on to me some streets full of blood
on the thrid day of xmas my god gave on to me rivers runnning wild
on the forth day of xmas my god gave on to me some enemys to kill
on the fifth day of xmas my god gave on to me beaches to enjoy
on the sixth day of xmas my god gave on to me some mines to have my fun
on the seventh day of xmas my god gave on to me ramps to leap and bound
on the eighth day of xmas my god gave on to me a motorised screw and a new vehicle
on the ninth day of xmas my god gave on to me almost every car there was to play
on the tenth day of xmas my god gave on to me all races won
on the eleveth day of xmas my god gave on to me a bottle of champagne
on the twelfth day of xmas my god gave on to me a place in one hot hell laughing all the way.

i hope that was good lol.

jwb1971's picture
Cunning Stunt Licker
PayPal Backer
Posts: 129
Submitted: Tue, 11/12/2012 - 15:36

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Giblets

It's beginning to look a lot like giblets
Everywhere I go
Take a look at them all again
A crowd of women and men
With dismembered limbs and pools of blood that flow

It's beginning to look a lot like giblets
Skidding to and fro
Cunning stunts I do make
Leaving carnage in my wake
When the flag man says Go!

It's beginning to look a lot like giblets
Shifting from 3 to 4
And the final sight you'll see
Is the car driven by me
Smearing you on the floor!

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